Day 155 - Time
Since finishing chemo a whirlwind has encroached my life. First, I was overjoyed, I was healthy, I was free. I had more energy than I have had in years and I could achieve anything. Then, I got sick. Sick like I used to be. And everything was horrible again. I had no energy, I was sleeping more again, I was waking up exhasuted still, and EVERYTHING was causing me pain. I concluded that the chemotherapy had taken away whatever underlying issue I really had, and now that I was done, I was sick again.
Doctors agreed with me. I have seen several specialists now and have more appointments lined up to try and figure out why I'm in so much pain still. The fatigue has improved, however. I think the warmer weather improves my energy levels, and I'm able to do a lot more than I was in that peroid of darkness. It was to most crushing thing, to believe I was healthy only to have been lied to by my own body/the world. Experiencing that taste of freedom was a shock to the system when taken away.
It has been 4 months now since it ended. I have another scan soon to check if things are still fine. I'm feeling comfortable in myself again and slowly regaining strength. It's great.
I haven't forgotten about this list.
In the space between my last post and this, I have accomplished several of my 101 goals and simply haven't found the time or energy to write about it. I'm unsure how many things I've completed but I will write a blog for each still, as promised.
Time is weird though. And things are strange, too.
Milly x
Doctors agreed with me. I have seen several specialists now and have more appointments lined up to try and figure out why I'm in so much pain still. The fatigue has improved, however. I think the warmer weather improves my energy levels, and I'm able to do a lot more than I was in that peroid of darkness. It was to most crushing thing, to believe I was healthy only to have been lied to by my own body/the world. Experiencing that taste of freedom was a shock to the system when taken away.
It has been 4 months now since it ended. I have another scan soon to check if things are still fine. I'm feeling comfortable in myself again and slowly regaining strength. It's great.
I haven't forgotten about this list.
In the space between my last post and this, I have accomplished several of my 101 goals and simply haven't found the time or energy to write about it. I'm unsure how many things I've completed but I will write a blog for each still, as promised.
Time is weird though. And things are strange, too.
Milly x
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